Updated: Nov 13, 2019
This post was written and submitted by Tracy Dorsey of The Melanated Mom Podcast
I felt led to start a podcast for over a year now. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into a whole year later, and I still had not started.
What makes us (and by us, I guess I mean me) overthink every process of starting? What is so painful about the start? When I daydream I always see myself at a starting line of a race, project, or new adventure with a huge smile on my face. In my dreams, I am ready to kill that thing and beast my way through the finish line. Real life looks so different.
You can usually find me cradled in a fetal position refusing to be pulled out by anything or anyone. Procrastinating whatever you have been called to do can be likened to stabbing your own self in the back. When you are called to something, your mind, body, and spirit will be in complete disarray until you obey the call.
So for one year, I lived in creative lack, for one year I didn’t get one of my greatest needs met, for one year I was mad at everyone, for no reason that I could put my finger on. In essence, I am saying that even a bad start is better than no start at all.
I jumped into podcasting all weird like. I knew what I wanted to talk about and I knew who I wanted to address but other than that I had no real clue of what I was doing. Funny thing is, I didn’t care. It felt better to record something that felt like complete garbage than to not record at all. I remember sitting in the “Camry Entertainment Studios” (all of my episodes come to my audience via my Camry in my garage) thinking what the heck am I even talking about, but I also felt giddy and excited that I got my courage up. One published episode with a shaky voice turned into more and more episodes with an extreme surge of confidence to follow. I am still learning everything. I am lousy at technology and every aspect of this journey requires a steep learning curve. I smile and laugh at myself a lot but there are also times I want to throw my laptop at the closet wall and watch it crumble into a million tiny pieces.
All of this is growth, it is all an experience that no one can take away from me. It requires me to go balls to the wall even when I don’t know if any of what I am saying will resonate with anyone who may listen.
About that resonating part, there will always be someone who can relate. My podcast is regarding motherhood and I am to my listeners what I needed to hear when I thought it was impossible for me to take care of one more tiny human. One more tiny human, at 40 years old, going through unchecked postpartum depression, with perimenopause right on the heels of it. If I can find my voice at what I considered to be an extreme low for me, so can you!
Without your voice, someone will miss what they need to hear. Only you can deliver your message. Wherever you are and whatever you are thinking about starting, just start. Starts don’t have to be perfect but without a beginning, you have already failed to create an end.
Tracy, also known as the Melanated Mom, is a podcaster, blogger and mother of 3 amazing beings. She inspires moms to raise their children to be free, creative and independent thinkers in a world that would have POC believe differently. She also encourages moms to not forget about themselves in the process. Tracy can be found at www.melanatedmom.com